legal

Domestic Violence and Washington Family Court

How DV allegations may influence parenting plans in Washington.

Washingtoncustody

FAMILY & PARENTING SAFETY

Parenting Plans and Safety Concerns After Relationship Harm

Parenting-Plan Basics

A parenting plan is a written document that explains how children will be cared for when adults are no longer living together. It can be informal between the adults, written with the help of a mediator, or turned into a court order. The details and legal effect can vary by province or territory.

Parenting plans usually cover:

Where the children live and when (schedules and holidays)
How decisions are made about school, health, culture, and activities
How children will be transported between homes
How the adults will communicate about the children
How new partners or relatives are involved with the children

When there has been relationship harm or control, a “standard” parenting plan may not be safe or realistic. Safety, predictability, and reducing contact between adults often become higher priorities.

In Canada, family law and terminology (for example “parenting time,” “contact,” “access,” or “decision-making responsibility”) are not identical across all provinces and territories. Local legal information or duty counsel can explain which terms apply where you live.

Raising Safety and Violence Concerns

It is possible to bring up violence, threats, or coercive control when discussing parenting plans, but how this is done can affect safety. Many people share information gradually and in different places, such as with a lawyer, mediator, family-justice worker, or the court.

Ways people sometimes raise concerns include:

Keeping a brief, factual record of worrying incidents, dates, and impacts on the children
Mentioning specific safety worries in any court forms, affidavits, or discussions with legal help
Sharing information about past police involvement, child‑protection contact, or protective orders if it is safe to do so
Explaining how the behaviour affects children’s routines, sleep, school, or sense of security

If you are working with a mediator or family-justice professional, you can usually ask if they have training in family violence and what safety options exist, such as separate rooms or virtual meetings.

If raising concerns could trigger more anger or monitoring, consider where and how you share information. Using a safe phone, secure email, or a trusted support person to pass documents may reduce risk.

Safety-Based Scheduling

Parenting schedules can be adapted to reduce risk of harm and limit conflict. The safest schedule will look different for each situation and may change over time.

Examples of safety-focused approaches include:

Minimizing in‑person contact between adults: using curb‑side or school-based exchanges, or having a third person supervise pick‑ups and drop‑offs
Using neutral locations: meeting at a community centre, supervised exchange program, or another public, predictable place
Structuring communication: restricting communication to written messages (email, parenting apps, or text) that stay focused on the children
Shorter, more frequent parenting time: when there are worries about substance use, neglect, or unpredictable behaviour
Daytime-only time: avoiding overnights if there are concerns about night‑time safety
Supervised parenting time: having a trusted third party or formal program present during visits when risk is higher

Some people also plan “backup” arrangements if the other adult does not show up, refuses return, or repeatedly changes plans. These details can sometimes be written into a parenting plan or court order.

Safety-based parenting plans may feel different from typical shared‑care arrangements. Courts, mediators, and lawyers in Canada are increasingly expected to consider family violence, but practices still differ across regions.

Role of Domestic Violence Protection Orders (DVPOs)

Courts across Canada have different types of protection, restraining, peace bond, or family‑violence orders. These are sometimes called Domestic Violence Protection Orders (DVPOs) or similar terms. The exact name, process, and strength of these orders depend on the province or territory and on whether the order comes from criminal or family court.

In parenting and safety planning, these orders may:

Set rules about contact between the adults (for example, no direct contact except for written communication about children)
Limit how close one adult can come to the other’s home, work, or children’s school
Control how and where child exchanges happen (for example, at a police station or supervised location)
Temporarily decide who children live with while longer‑term parenting issues are worked out
Include specific conditions about weapons, substance use, or attendance at programs

Sometimes there can be more than one order in place—such as a criminal no‑contact order and a family‑court parenting order—with different terms. Keeping copies of current orders and checking for conflicts can help reduce confusion and risk.

If you are unsure how a protection order interacts with a parenting plan or court order, local legal information services, duty counsel, or community legal clinics can sometimes explain the options and limits, but cannot guarantee outcomes.

Support and Information

People navigating parenting plans and violence concerns often combine different kinds of help: legal information, community supports, and trusted friends or family. Additional support options across Canada can be found through resources listed at DV.Support.